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1D Fanfiction - Spellchecker Deactivated (Liam/Zayn)
Bill Nails
Title: Spellchecker Deactivated
Rating: M
Genre and/or Pairing: Humour/Crack!Fic - Liam/Zayn
Warnings: None
Word Count: 935
Notes: Filling another of my prompts on the 2015 kink meme (basically anything involving Liam writing terrible Ziam fics within an established Liam/Zayn relationship) because I couldn't resist - I massively encourage other people to go and write their own versions though!My sincerest apologies to Liam (for obvious reasons) and Microsoft Word spellchecker - you tried, babe, but I ignored you the whole way. And please don't be offended by my mocking of poor fanfic writing - I am guilty of so many fanfic sins even now, and we won't even talk about the time 13-year-old me wrote a Jimmy Neutron/Cindy Vortex fic (spoiler alert: it wasn't good). In addition: ironically this was posted on AO3 for an entire day with a misspelling of the word 'deactivated' in the title, which was not in any way intentional. Facepalm.
Summary: Liam cheerfully enjoys writing terrible Ziam fanfiction, but Zayn loves him anyway.

Spellchecker Deactivated

Liam loves writing. It’s so much fun, just the most fantastic way to kill time on the tourbus, and on top of that he can write about his favourite person in the entire world.

His fingers clatter over the keyboard as he writes out his latest fic ‘True Luv For Zayn’ (Rating: Explicit, Summary: Zayn is reallly sexy and Liam doesnt no if he could ever be wiht someone that hot. But what will happen when Zayn says that he LUVS LIAM???!).

He’s nearly up to the sex scene though, and sex scenes are tricky. They should be easy, really, given the amounts of vigorous, mind-blowing sexual activity Liam gets to indulge in on a daily basis with Zayn actual-real-life Malik, but somehow getting the words onto his screen is really quite difficult. He can do this, though. He got a kudos on his last fic, didn’t he?

Nailed it.

“Zayn you are so hot!” Liam said putting his hand in the hair of the ebony-haired man.

“No you are”

“But Zayn your the most beutiful person I have ever seen!” as Zayns eyes glitter in the moonlight that glows through the bed room window.

Pretty good, Liam thinks with a little nod to himself. Set the scene. Get the readers hooked.

“Zayn I want you to kiss me please do it” says Liam and then Zayn is kissing him hard and there tonges tangle together in there mouths, and Zayn moans Liam into Liams mouth.

They take of there clothes quickly and Zayn lies down on the bed.

“Zayn… can I… I want to touch your manhood” Liam says blushing red because he is embarrassed.

“YES!” Zayn shouts because he’s really turned on, his groin throbbing in antipication of Liam. “Please touch me I am so desperate for you.”

Liam is in awe of the beautiful male on his bed. He reaches out slowly and grasps Zayns -

Liam pauses as the door opens behind him.

“Alright?” Zayn says. “What’re you doing, babe? You writing again?”

He comes up behind Liam and drapes his arms over his shoulders. He’s got his glasses on and he peers over Liam’s shoulder to read the screen.

“Yep,” Liam smiles at him. “Which of these would sound better: hard rod or throbbing staff?”

Zayn blinks at the screen, looking confused. Sometimes Liam forgets that Zayn isn’t a fic writer like he is; he doesn’t know these things.

“That’s okay,” Liam says kindly, patting Zayn’s hand. “I can choose.”

“Li, remember what I said last time? About how you can actually use the word ‘cock’ and it’s not, like, illegal or anything.”

Liam shakes his head. “Zayn, we’ve been through this. Not everyone wants to read crude things. Some people like to read stories that are beautiful and romantic and stuff.” Zayn smiles and presses a kiss to Liam’s head. He’s so lovely, sometimes.

“You’re the expert, babe. I’m sure it’ll be a fantastic story.”

Liam starts typing again (he’s going for hard rod this time, to give a bit of variety) but Zayn is kissing his neck and nipping at his ear in a way that’s very distracting.

“If I suck you off will you use it as inspiration for your next story?” Zayn asks him.

“Zayn, stop it, I really want to get this chapter finished,” Liam says, because Zayn is a beautiful, evil distraction at all times and Liam never gets anything done as a result.

“I’ll keep the glasses on?” Zayn breathes against his ear.

“Okay, fine,” Liam sighs, because how can he possibly say no to that? Zayn is a sexy nuisance and should be stopped. “But give me two minutes, I’ll finish this part and the rest can just go in another chapter tomorrow.”

Next time, he’s definitely writing about Zayn’s glasses.


It’s a good job Liam’s sexy, sweet, funny and not actually as brainless as his endeavours in fic writing would imply, Zayn thinks when he’s lying in bed later; the poor guy just gets a little bit overexcited and forgets that some people in the world have slightly more stringent ideas about spelling and grammar. And that proof reading is a thing.

Thankfully their real life sex-life is fantastic, and Liam even manages a bit of dirty talk sometimes. Zayn nearly came all over himself the first time he got Liam to accidentally say fuck in the bedroom, and it’s still a work in progress, but he’s getting there. Zayn’s got no complaints whatsoever.

The fanfiction is mildly disturbing at times, sure, but Zayn’s learnt to deal with it; it’s the writing style rather than the content that’s the issue, since Liam’s stories to date have remained fairly vanilla. Nevertheless Zayn can’t always reconcile the sex god he’s fucking in the bedroom to the man who once wrote a story about Liam ‘ejaculating from his pulsating love shaft on to his beuatiful angel Zayns face’.

Factually accurate it may be, but pulsating love shaft? Christ.

 It’s decidedly endearing, though, all things considered, that Liam loves him enough that he wants to write about him and their relationship and share it with the world in his own small way. He writes the most ridiculously sappy descriptions of Zayn that never fail to cheer him up.

Smiling fondly to himself, Zayn glances over to ensure Liam’s definitely asleep and then opens up the AO3 website on his phone. He finds Liam’s fic and scrolls to the bottom, tapping his thumb over the button with the little heart symbol he’s come to know and love.

1 guest left kudos on this work!



Glasses!Zayn wasn't even supposed to be here, but he made an appearance anyway, the minx.


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